So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
he puts the penis in happiness.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
you never un-have a 4some
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