i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I smell stomach acid.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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