Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
How external is "for external use only"?
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
