I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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