He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
