new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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