their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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