I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Drunk is not a location!
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
