what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize