I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
