when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
