He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize