i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
wow bdsm is so cute
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