Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
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