I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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