I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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