were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
well most of my day revolves around power hour
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
