ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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