Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Your penis caused this!
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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