A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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