let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
