if i can run in heels then i can drive
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
