no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
