I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Randomize
