I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize
