i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
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