so explain again why im purple
no
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
