WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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