She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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