Christians are straight up FREAKS
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Randomize
