i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
