I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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