i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
im holly from the hills drunk
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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