You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Randomize
