no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Randomize
