he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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