Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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