I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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