Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize