I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
