we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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