Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Do you remember whose house we're in?
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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