I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Randomize
