I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
