he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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