ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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