I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Randomize