dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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