i don't like sucking hair
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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