Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize