I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize